June 18, 2017

Sunday - Sunny but muggy

An awful day.

We both slept in this morning, it was nearly noon when we finally got up.  We decided to go out for lunch but F was in one of his moods and demanded that I pick the place, but really he didn’t want to go anywhere except a ramen shop.  I wasn’t going to one of those, so I suggested a couple of places that we usually like.  We even have a discount card for them and they are fairly reasonable.  He decided that he would drop me off at one of them.  Which he did.  

I didn’t go there, I was too angry.  Here it was, noonish and I was out in the midday sun with no sunscreen. I had left it at home, thinking I’d only be out for a few minutes. Thankfully I had worn my big sunhat.  I walked to a convenience store, bought some food, and then walked to the apartment and ate.  I shut the door to the room I was in, so when F showed up a few minutes later wasn’t too surprised.  

He took the air conditioner out and left.  I used the washroom, looked around and went back to my room.  

He came back and did something and then seemed to disappear.  I couldn’t hear him any more.  I checked and the car was there, his shoes were there, but he wasn’t.  I found him sleeping (or pretending to) in one of the closets for futons.  What an idiot.  

I left him alone for a while then offered him a coffee.  He got a little friendlier after that.  He told me about taking the air conditioner to the shop and that he hadn’t had lunch.  That was crazy.  I had managed to walk to the convenience store and buy my lunch, he had a car and he couldn’t get anything? He asked if there were any movies playing and as it happens, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 was playing in half an hour.  I had earlier decided to go by myself if he didn’t start acting better.  

We drove to the theater and went to see the movie.  F got some food at the bakery and wolfed it down, and we shared a tub of popcorn during the show.  I think I enjoyed the film even more the second time.  I could concentrate on some of the characters more than the story this time.  

After the movie we went to Doutors for a while.  It was very quiet.  We didn’t talk, both of us used the wifi and drank our drinks.  

We got something for F’s mother and brought it back for her.  F was in the house for a long time, and I didn’t want to be, so I went outside and contemplated my life and what I want and what I’m not getting.  

When he came out, he again demanded that I choose the restaurant.  I suggested a couple of Korean ones, he drove past one but it looked busy so he kept driving.  I suggested another restaurant we always go to, he said it was okay but he didn’t like it.  I pointed out that I didn’t like it that much either, but it has wifi, is cheap and fast.  When I asked him where he wanted to go, he named a few restaurants that are absolute pits and I said I wouldn’t go to any of them. Not only was the food bad, but most of them were ramen joints.  

He decided to please himself and drove off into the night. He was trying to find a place in the next town that he likes but it was closed so he had to turn around and come back.  We were talking a little by then, but not much.  

He found a place in Tsuruoka finally that had Chinese food, so I had a set meal and he had ramen.  It was fine, actually much better than I was expecting.  It wasn’t cheap, but by that time I really didn’t give a crap.  

We came back to the house and came upstairs.  He took a shower and has gone to bed, I’m still up.  I know he’s worried about money, but I’m not the person who has dragged out this move. I’m also not the person who bought themselves a new car this year. I am the person who has had this unwanted move forced upon them, and who is now trying to decide if remaining here is something that I am willing to put myself through. In two short days we will be out of the apartment and the next phase of my life will begin.  I believe in self-preservation first so there may be some big changes coming up.  


Come back later and see if things get any better or if we continue acting stupid.  Until tomorrow….

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